Where things stand

It's 10:36 pm.  I wanted to go to bed no later than 10:30, but I only just got dd2 down.  I still have a couple of things I want to do before I go off to bed. 

My life is very disorganized.  Part of this is because I have no energy.  Part of that is because I don't get enough sleep.  The other part is that I struggle with depression, and some days it wins.  When that happens, the clutter and disorganization drive me crazy.  I want to just make it all go away.  But I don't have the energy to do it.  It's sort of a vicious cycle.  Depressed over clutter, but too depressed to do anything about it. 

One thing I want to try is getting to bed at a regular time.  If I get dd2 to bed around 9 or 9:30 at the latest, I can get to bed between 10 and 10:30.  That gives me enough sleep each night (8 hours) that I should be able to rule out sleep deprivation as one of the causes of the complete chaos in my life.

The other thing is that I need to get dd2 and I on a schedule.  We are so disorganized. She watches far too much TV.  She is a little wild, unruly thing.  I love that about her, but she needs structure.  Apparently so do I.  I spend all day accomplishing very little, and it's not like I'm wasting time playing games or anything.  I'm checking email, looking for writing jobs, just caught up in...stuff.  Nothing.  And then it's dinner time, and we're ordering takeout because I have nothing thawed.

So my plan is to get up with dd2 at 8 or 8:30 a.m. and spend the first hour on the computer checking email, twitter, job sites, whatever.  She can watch TV or a movie during that time and eat breakfast.  Then we will both get up and dressed and brush hair and teeth.  That should take us to about 10 a.m. or so, and I haven't figured out exactly what comes next.

Here are things I do want to include, although some not every day:

Laundry
Lunch
Cooking Dinner
De-cluttering (at least 15 minutes per day, hopefully more)
Preschool with dd2
Visiting the library
Playground visits
Playgroups, if I can find them.
Grocery shopping with coupons
Keeping up with appointments/phone calls (doctor, dentist, etc)
Writing (min. 750 words per day)
Spend time with dd10 and ds14.

I don't know what else.  And I'm tired, so I'm going to leave it at that.